Well, Well, well

Hello everyone, not spoke to you guys in a while. Just been round at reeces, and sometimes I cant help but think hes a bit of a fruit loop. First off he made me some toast because Id not had my dinner because my mum made me some but my orange juice leaked in my tupaware box so they all went soggy, I showed Reece but he just started wretching. Any way so hes making me this toast and he starts talking all scientific about the toaster and tells me theres a specially designed tray at the bottom that collects crumbs, I obviosly told him he was bleeding crackers and that you have to turn it upside down over the bin to get the crumbs out.

Any way he is good with computers (so he says). To be fair to him he showed me this thing on the computer where you can draw with paints and spray paints and buckets of paint but the screen stays dry.Bananas!

what reece painted on the computer

what reece painted on the computer

Any way the reason Im doing this blog specially, is because reece thinks it would be a good idea to do a visual blog. Now for those of you who are like me and havnt studied sciencetistics, its basically where somehow we film our self talking and then put it on the computer, theres a thing called a web cam that you can use. To be honest my mum said never play with wigi boards but if you would like to see me and reece do a visual blog then I will definatly get involved. So what do you think?

Untill next time…..BANANAS!

Les

Well, well ,well

Im really sorry I haven’t blogged in so long, I have been so busy these last couple of weeks. I have been in Blackpool, and as you know Blackpool doesnt have the internet there yet, or channel 5. I went there initially because my uncle is getting married for the 3rd time and he had what they call a ‘stag do’. A stag do is when a group of men go to Blackpool and be all Menish, We all were wearing t-shirts that said ‘Menish to society’ on them, I dont really know what that meant but my uncle said they were “priceless”.He was also wearing a cow boy hat saying ‘shag me quick’  on it, I dont know what the rush was.

Any way we all went out drinking beer, I heard alot of swearing, shouting and sexist comments, mostly from my uncle. He was being rude to girls walking past. He was asking to see their tuppense but I told him that name for the currency wasn’t used any more. He just laughed and told me I was funny which was nice of him. He also said that he could degrade women because it was his stag do and your allowed.

me and my uncles mates

me and my uncles mates

The night ended with my uncle being sick on a stripper and the rest of the lads stripping him naked and making a pair of pants for him out of duck tape. It was nice of the guys not to leave him completely naked. Since that night the weddings been called off and I haven’t seen my uncle since.

So I stayed in Blackpool to try and do some stand up, I did! It was on the pier but it still counts, one man said that not even the laughing policeman would laugh at me, it’s nice that they were taking me seriously.

Any way i’m back now, think Reece is pleased about that, I brought him a pebble back that looked like Bernad Manning but he said it didnt count because it wasnt a vegtable.

Bananas!

Untill next time

Les

Girlfriends?

April 15, 2009

Well well well, yesterday I was watching a film and there were this couple (a man and a woman) and they really liked each other, and they were kissing and that and everything seemed right good, but then they they started arguing and it all went bad and she started throwing things at him (nothing that could seriously harm him just like pillows and his collection of now thats what I call music cds). Then she started crying and then they started kissin and getting all clammy. I got a bit clammy watching it.

So it got me thinking are girlfriends a good idea? Some times things appear right good and next minute your getting now thats what I call music cds thrown at you. Iv never had a girlfriend, its because I been really busy, not enough time. When I go on Britians got talent one day, I might try my luck with Amanda Holden. Also I have a neighbour who makes me all clammy when I think of her. Shes lovely. Oh Wendy.

To sum up, I think I will wait, I dont think I need a girlfriend,why settle for a quarter of lemon bon bons when you can have a selection of boiled sweets,(long as you have enough money on you in the sweet shop) Il see if Wendy ever pops round to borrow a now thats what I call music cd.

Until next time-Bananas!

Les

Easter! Easter! Easter!

April 13, 2009

Well well well, as we all know it was Easter yesterday apparantly we celebrate it because tens and tens of years ago Jesus got stuck in a cave and some one blocked the cave up with a massive Easter egg but he manage to break free. It was just a massive coincidence that it happened on Easter day I think.

I didnt get any eggs yesterday, none at all, Reece asked me if I wanted to come round for boiled eggs but thats just not the same, his dads not been too well either so I didnt want to intrude. Im not bothered really as im not a huge fan of chocolate any way. But it would have been nice to recieve an egg, I like the one with the egg cups or mugs that come with the egg.

I did have an odd day yesterday, I was walking through the park back home when I saw a man crying on a bench,at first I was a little scared and considered running the rest of the way home, but I was actually sat next to the man at the time and thought that it may be a little inapropriate. I couldnt work out why he was crying, I thought that he might had not recieved an egg, but it appeared to be a little far fetched to be weeping in a public place over a lack of chocolate eggs. I then noticed he had a lead with him, he was grasing the handle tightly. I followed the lead down to see what he was walking, as I got to the bottom I realised there wasnt owt there. Its then the man looked at me and said “Dead! Dead! Dead!”. It was at this point I found it approiate to run the rest of the way home.

I think theres a lesson to be learnt in this story. Im not sure what at the moment though.

Until next time- Bananas!

Les

Britains Got Talent

April 11, 2009

Well well well, one of my jobs as a comedian is to keep up to date with todays television. And one of britains most britishly british telly programmes on at the moment is the popular Britians Got Talent. Not only are most of the acts a right laugh in the early stages, Amanda Holden makes me warm and frustrated. People say Simon Cowl is a horrible bloke, but I personally really like him, although he doesnt make me as clammy as Amanda does. Peirce Morgan confuses me, his face is all stale. I dont know when hes happy or sad, like the face of an owl.

Any way I just saw a woman on it that looks like a brilo pad wrapped in curtains. Everyone was laughing at her which was pretty horrible but it turns out shes a right good singer, people were clapping then standing up which apparantly is better than just clapping sitting down. I had shivers but a different kind of shiver that I have when I think of Amanda. There was also a group on called flawless, Peirce Morgon said they were elecrtifying, I dont know if that is a good thing or or not, but I liked them. I cant wait for the next episode, il have to watch it when its on though because I havent got that catch up thing.

I hope I meet Amanda Holden one day.

Bananas

Les

Banana’s!

April 11, 2009

Hello ladees and gentelmen, boys and girls, lads and lasses, curly wurlys and twirls!

I am Les Do-it: A 26 year old Comedian / DJ / Entertainer / Songwriter / Glass collecter. This is my website that my friend Reece… well not friend, more person I know who’s good at computers, has set up for me so I can reach a world wide audience in America and acheeve my dream of becoming the worlds greatest comedian.

Here’s one to wet you wissle (ooo pardon!)

Two Candels in a bar. One says to the other “Will you go out with me!”

Banana’s!

See you later!

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